Who are They? Introductions, please!
Who wants to walk into a room and not see anyone they know? Not me! When I walk into a meeting or a party I feel pretty anxious until I find someone I know. Do you feel nervous, too? How about when a friend invites you to their house for a party and you walk in they are nowhere to be seen. Do you stand there awkwardly wondering what to do while everyone else seems to be talking to each other oblivious that you are even there. What you need at a time like that is to be introduced.
My website has already given you an introduction to me. My name is all over it! If you visited my other pages you know a few other things about me as well. Those two things: learning someone’s name and learning something about them are the goals of introductions. Once you have been introduced to someone you can feel more comfortable joining in their conversation or sitting next to them. I have already met many of you but not all. If we were with each other in person we would need an introduction. Ideally, the leader of the meeting or the host/hostess would introduce us. However, many people, even mature ones, do not know how to make introductions. Many times they forget and that leaves strangers sitting next to each other without speaking. Weird! Not to worry. That doesn’t have to happen to you. Just introduce yourself!
If I want to meet someone here’s what I do. I step up to them, look in their eyes and smile. I say,
“I don’t think we have met. My name is Grammy!”.
Usually the other person will tell me their name, but if they don’t, I just say,
“And you are?”
When they tell me their name, I make sure to use it before I forget it. I say, for example,
“Nice to meet you, Andy.”
If social distancing is not an issue, I stick out my hand for a handshake. A handshake should be just a quick, medium squeeze of their hand and then quickly let go.
Don’t stop there, though. Share something or ask something to start a conversation. You may ask,
“Andy, how do you know our hostess?’
or
“David, I’m one of Erica’s friends from church (or wherever).”
Just find something to add. It doesn’t have to be much.
If you don’t know everyone it is the hostess’s job to introduce you. If the gathering is in your home, or if you are in charge of a meeting, the introductions are your job.
When you are introducing two people, address the person with the highest standing first. Here’s how you decide who that is. If it’s a family setting or social setting, it is the person who is older. If it’s a business or structured meeting setting, it’s the person who has more authority. Speak to that person first. You always want to call people by their names and say their names as often as possible. Andy is older than Erica, so I would speak to Andy first and say,
“Andy, I’d like to introduce you to Erica.”
Now the two people will stop looking at you and look at each other. Then say to the second person, using their name,
“Erica, I’d like you to meet Andy.”
It’s also good to include how you are connected to each of them, i.e. how you know them.
“Andy, I’d like to introduce you to my co worker, David.”
“David, this is my neighbor, Andy.”
At that point the two of them may pick up on the information and start talking, especially if they already have heard about each other.
If not, the third step, the one most people don’t do, is to tell them something about each other. If you know something they have in common besides knowing you, be sure to tell them that. For example, I could say,
“Andy, David is also a SCUBA diver, like you.”
Another example would be to say,
“You guys are both transplanted northerners.”
Can you see how that would help them get started talking? Introducing people this way and helping them have something to talk about is so polite and really helps them feel included. It’s such a bummer to be in a gathering and be ignored. If you do these things I think that you will feel good about your ability to connect with people.
This simple skill will open the door to relationships for you. Another thing that helps relationships progress is to greet people properly when you arrive. I call that “working a room.” That will be our next blog topic. It’s a valuable relationship building skill you will want to have. I can help you with that and I want to help you with that!
I hope that this information was helpful and that you will come again to read the next blog.
You can find me on Facebook at A Dose of Grammy
Or on twitter at Rachel M Mathew @RachelMMathew1
Awesome
So glad that you like it!
Love it!
Thank you, Norma!
Rachael, 9/28/21
I wondered if there was an age group you are l trying to reach?
I was truly fortunate that I learned some of those attributes from family members. As well as, taking some classes in school that gave me a desire to choose a career change. So I was able to start my own business. But before I could actually do that, I took sales training courses. It was a the best decision I ever made. It was a great experience. I learned so much about myself & people’s nature.. It really helped me tremendously especially the importance of how to approach people & questions to ask. We need to know about his genuine appreciation for others thoughts, their needs & concerns. As an entrepreneur I had to learn how to ask the right questions. I had to learn how to be a better listener & be sensitive to peoples interest, thoughts, their opinions, their own needs & desires. As well as, show them respect no matter what. It was very rewarding. Thanks for being so encouraging Rachael Thanks for sharing your insight .